Posts Tagged ‘Blogging



04
Apr
13

one month – reflections & my first black guy…

Hey, thanks for reading, for following, for sharing. I really hope that you enjoy my stories. Sometimes it feels like I am just masturbating words here, but I do enjoy it. (The writing, that is. Oh, okay – I enjoy masturbating too, but let’s stay on topic!!) I decided to get on Twitter to cross-promote my blog and I don’t think I gained any blog followers as a result, but I found Twitter to be a really cool and interesting place. It’s sort of like your favorite bar where you most raunchy and funny friends hang out all the time and blow each other shit & say all sort of crude stuff. I love it! I feel like I fit right in but it’s also a bit cliquey and I find myself feeling somewhat dismayed when people don’t like what I tweet. I hate looking to others for validation – even though I do work hard to make people laugh – even in real life. I don’t have to prove anything to anyone here though, really. Yes, I write for humor and with an audience in mind, but this is my place. Of course, feel free to follow me on Twitter @risquedivorcee if you feel so inclined. I’ve been there about two weeks and have been blogging here for exactly one month today. Happy one month anniversary!

In honor of the occasion, I will share the story of my first black guy. The guy? Meh. The sex? Oh maaaaannnnn! Now, don’t get me wrong – I’ve seen and had some lovely big, white cocks too and I’m no “sizeist” – I’ll entertain a smaller cock. Easier to deep-throat, don’t give you a cramp in the jaw, might consider for ass play…but I do enjoy a nice, big cock. This one was probably the longest I’ve ever dealt with and had a decent amount of girth as well. Too bad it was attached to an ass.

N43 was someone that I chatted with for a pretty long time before meeting. We probably messaged on and off for three weeks before we finally managed to meet for a drink. We chatted about work-related stuff, kids, life – it wasn’t very sexual, but it was flirty. I was still in my “need dick” phase after having been disappointed by the teddy bear who didn’t quite make it in. I had other interests that were also engaging, but I was sort of excited by the prospect of getting my first taste of black cock.

Eventually we met at a pub – it was a bit too loud to talk and he was dressed a little too “casually” for a first meeting I thought. He seemed to not have made very much of an effort to pull himself together for me. We had some drinks and talked and he had a really annoying habit of saying “hah?” when he couldn’t hear me or didn’t understand me…which was often. He was cute enough, smelled good, had a great smile and lovely dimples, but mostly the conversation was dead in the water and I was not into it. When we went out to the parking lot, he got a little more physical with me – putting his hands on my hips, flirting. Eventually, the discussion turned to “so, what should we do now?” and “when do you have to work tomorrow?” Those are both cues for “want to fuck?” So I followed him home. (Yes, I let my friend know where I was going!) On the way, we stopped at a gas station because he needed to get something. I assumed that it was condoms. He came out with a bag in hand and we proceeded to his place.

At his apartment, he got the bag out and come to find out, it was a 40 oz. beer he had bought – for himself. He offered me no refreshment. He turned on the TV. We sat on the couch. I think Full House was on. What the hell? I don’t want to watch TV. I want you to seduce me and touch me and I want to ride your cock. It was so peculiar. I wonder if he thought he had to “ease” me into sex? If so, maybe he might have considered offering me a drink too, huh?

So strange was the scene that I finally asked if we could turn the TV off and maybe put on some music instead. He did so and also dimmed the lights because I didn’t really need all his neighbors seeing us on the couch – he had the shades open too. Oh, also – on the couch. I was never invited to a bedroom. Hmmmm. He was very laid back as things got going – he put his arm around me and we kissed a little bit. That was lovely – he had a great mouth which sadly did nothing more than kiss me above the waist, but the sex turned out to be really good. Also, he had a great body. Lithe and sinewy without being too bony or skinny. Yum. Oddly, we had barely been making out for a few minutes when I realized that he had his dick out of his pants. I mean, he hasn’t even made it to second base and he’s rounding home in his hand? Really? Weird.

I was anxious to get hold of his member, but I also wanted to make sure that I got to fuck it and not just suck it! So I basically whispered exactly that to him. His response? “Hah?” Ugh! I finally stopped being cute & cuddly, lifted my head off from him and said “I would like to suck your cock, but I want to make sure that I still get to fuck you.” BOOM! Read between the lines! Sheesh. Turns out, it wasn’t a problem. He had a good 10″ or so when fully erect. Not a ton of girth, but decent. With a slight curve toward his belly. Very, very nice. I gave him a little oral attention, but I was mostly interested in having him inside me, so I got out a condom because, no surprise, he hadn’t produced any when he went and got a towel to put on the sofa. We got the condom on his lovely, lovely dick and he soon slid into me from behind. Thank you, lord. So very nice. Exactly, exactly what I needed. And it was given to me three times! Three times! Very unexpected from a 43-year-old man. I would think that we were done and then he would just start right back up again. The second time the condom broke which really sucked. I think it simply couldn’t handle the mass plus fluid. Damn. Such a nice one.

After the sex, I was cleaning up and getting dressed as it was after 3am and I was about to do my very first walk of shame. 🙂 He then went into the kitchen and started cooking bratwurst. While still naked. He was a sight to behold walking around the kitchen with his beautiful ass and huge cock – even when flaccid. He explained that he was really hungry because he had skipped dinner to meet me. Well jeez, we met at a restaurant, guy. It was just a little strange still, but we did seem to be communicating better once we had fucked the sexual tension out of the room. Eventually, he walked me to the door (he had put on athletic pants, but that’s all) and kissed the back of my neck (swoon!) asking when he could see me again. I felt butterflies in my tummy and twat and said we would talk soon.

We arranged to have him come over on Sunday to watch football and that I would cook. It was pretty loose in that I told him to come over for the afternoon games, but I did cook and sent him directions and…he didn’t show or respond to texts. Hi, I’m offering you a day of food, football & sex and you don’t show? What man does that? Honestly, I think one with a girlfriend. I finally heard from him around 8pm. He texted apologies and said he had gone to church in the morning and wound up hanging out with his family. Okay, fine. I understand that stuff happens, but you do have a mobile cellular device, right? I said as much and he said I was right, he apologized and asked if I could forgive him. Okay, you get one mulligan because the sex was really fucking excellent. Come over tomorrow for Monday Night Football & leftovers. He even called me to re-send directions and we talked on the phone. Though I did question why he had deleted my text with my address and directions. What was up with that?  I told him that I was going to the store to get some drinks and asked if there was anything that he wanted. He purred “not yet.” Damn.

I reheated all the food and laid it out. I had the game recording on my DVR and I waited…and waited…

Finally I sent a text asking if he was lost, saying I was hungry and that it had to be nearly halftime. He responded with “oh, are you waiting on me, hun?” Yes. As discussed. Jeez. He told me not to wait and that he was finishing some stuff up at his place – which is like 35 minutes away anyway. I was livid. I said I was starting the game and eating. The next day, when he sent me a text, I said that I didn’t want to see him anymore because he was disrespectful of my time. He said he didn’t come because I seemed “cranky” – which I was after he’d stood me up the second time! Jeez! I told him to lose my number. Instead, he sent me “Happy Friday!” texts and “how are you” messages about three times a week for about six weeks. Often at 6-9am. Very passive-aggressive. I had at least learned not to respond – eventually they stopped. His POF account disappeared around the time that he stood me up the second time too. I have always imagined that he had a wife or girlfriend who found out about his extracurriculars and who made it difficult to get out to meet.

A few weeks ago, I noticed that he was on POF again with a new & different profile. I rolled my eyes a little bit and moved on. A couple of days later I got a message from him saying: “Hey you, how are you doing?”

Dangit – I’m doing a lot better than I was 7 months ago. If I didn’t think that there was something really sketchy and dishonest about you I would probably be good with giving you another tumble. Really. I’m not the kind of gal that you need to lie to. I can deal with wives, girlfriends, other women, other interests and responsibilities, etc. I don’t need the bullshit. In fact, the more I think about it, the more I realize that I would do a much better job of managing this guy now than I didn’t do back then! Hmmm, I guess it’s an option to keep open!

I will try to “double up” and post again tonight, my loves!

28
Mar
13

dilemma

Briefly – before I head out for my “weekend pre-funk” – or as some call it, Thursday night…

I wanted to share a bit of a dilemma that I’ve been having in keeping up with the blog & my life. I have to go out and do stuff in order to have stuff to write about. (Even though I currently have a backlog of topics, I admit.) Still, I have to communicate with the fellows too and that does get distracting and time-consuming at times. Especially when the payoff is a blowoff. How did Fonzie keep all of his women engaged? I need to have a text rotation.

The other big distraction right now is Twitter. I started doing it about two weeks ago as a means of promoting the blog and cross-posting to a new audience. Then I fell in love. Seriously, that place is like my favorite bar filled with my loudest, raunchiest friends – the ones who don’t gasp and shout “over the line!” when I say something outrageous or offensive. The ones that give me a star! Also, I can manage Twitter (she lied) on my phone in small drabs throughout the day.

The dilemma, then, is that I forget what I’ve said, what I’ve written, what I’ve promised to tell about. I can’t remember if that was something I told a friend on the phone, tweeted, blogged or thought about blogging. Dudes, I’m kinda old and often drunk. Plus I’ve had most of my brains fucked out…

Here’s the thing: I need to get disciplined and organized! I have outlines and topic headings that I am trying to work through, but life keeps happening every day and I need to keep track of that too. Basically, I need to catch up on some old “homework” and then keep you up to date on current stuff. So…less Facebook and more blogging!

Admittedly, I have been very engrossed in the Supreme Court hearings this week and have read and commented on most of the arguments. Equality is something that I support fully and am pretty loud and active about.

Here’s to being loud and active, ya’ll!

19
Mar
13

first meets and first meats

Man, chatting with three different men at the same time on POF does not help get a new blog post out! Facebook has also been hopping and drawing my attention away from my task at hand. Sometimes I feel so popular, other times so very solitary. I think this new world of social media contributes to that – we are always connected to others and yet can be very alone at the same time.

I added a static front page to my blog with my little “who is” bio. Tell me if it sucks. I just couldn’t figure out how to display my little cartoon image as a header without changing my theme. I swear I could get lost in trying to figure out the mechanics of page layout, but again, that takes me away from what I’m supposed to be doing here – writing!

This week has brought lots of texting, messaging & chatting with various men but not much 1:1 in-person interaction. I have a coffee date set for Thursday and a dinner, movie, sleepover date set for Friday though. Different fellas, naturally. My new “booty call” fuck buddy from the casino who wanted to be my regular sex slave? He put his hip out playing basketball on Sunday and is in agonizing pain. I’m thinking he’s going to be on injured reserve for awhile. How depressing! I like to have an active roster if I can. 😉 I told him that I was sorry that I broke him.

While I have a bit of a break from new adventures, I thought I would take the opportunity to get back to the progression of the online dating thing. After setting up my safety rules and evaluating my intent, I went back to chatting with and trying to meet folks. At first I was open to pretty much anyone that lived locally and asked. I quickly learned to be more selective and frankly, to be somewhat harsh. Online dating is very different than dating organically in the real world! The expectations are multiplied and inhibitions reduced!

I certainly talked to some scary, amusing, horrifying, interesting and colorful characters. More on that in another blog, for sure! Terrible pick-up lines and POF horror stories abound! But the first few meet-ups were pretty pathetic too. I blame myself to some extent. Being willing to give anyone a shot, staying too long, talking too long, seeming interested when you’re really not – these were my sins in the early days. I had to learn to say no and to get out before the guy starts picking out our wedding colors. God, do I sound like a man or what? But that’s sort of the problem. So many men see me as a nice, comfortable, middle-aged lady who probably makes a good pot-roast and would let them touch my boobies every so often.  While this may certainly be true, I also felt like there was a certain element of “oh, a fat girl won’t mind if I am a complete loser who makes no effort whatsoever.” There seemed to be guys that didn’t care whether we had anything in common or not, but who were just happy if I was willing to settle for them because they were willing to settle for me.

That sounds harsh, I guess, but since I was new to the scene, I didn’t realize that I didn’t have to settle at all – that I would eventually be inundated with offers from all sorts of men and that I would be able to be selective about who I wanted to spend my time with. Also, I hadn’t had sex in months and I will admit, I wasn’t feeling very picky. My mistake!

My first meet-ups were with C37, C41, H46, B36 & later N42.

C37 was cute enough in his pictures – somewhat sporty and a little bit of a bigger body type. I enjoyed talking to him on the phone, but he was a little bit um, “urban” I guess. I mean, one of those white boys who says “sup” and wears backwards caps, I guess? He would text from work and that was nice. We had a good dialogue and a little flirtation, but he was always talking about his medical stuff – headaches, blood pressure, blood sugar level, going to the doctor – and then he would mention that he was having another red bull and going out for a smoke. So maybe not the sharpest tool in the box, but I was looking for a tool in my box, so…I met him. In person he was much bigger than photos led me to believe. This is not a deal-breaker for me, but he was a bit pear-shaped and short. He also seemed to chain-smoke and talked with a perpetually “stuffy nose” sound that was a bit annoying. Turns out that was due to a major car accident he was in that contributes to the headaches as well. I wasn’t very attracted, but we shared a hug and made plans to get together again for dinner and football. I like to think that the person that I have evolved into since last summer would probably not have even given this guy my number, let alone set up a future meeting. C37 canceled our first planned evening due to some drama involving some female friend and her son that were in an abusive situation. Okay, that’s something that I can respect that also maybe puts up some red flags. Our second attempt was going to be dinner at his place and watching football afterwards.  What happened to my safety rules? Well, I had his name, address, phone number, place of employment, we’d met and I wanted to have sex and figured he would do! However, as I was on my way to his place and stuck in traffic, I called him to let him know that I would be later than expected. He then proceeded to do this moaning little bit about how if I would rather just cancel it was fine. He understood if I didn’t want to come over. I told him that wasn’t the situation, but his constant whining was beginning to get on my nerves, so I took the given opportunity to cancel and went with my gut – which said enough was enough with this guy! We chatted a few more times out of politeness in communicating the disinterest, but that was it for him.

C41 was probably my first “immediate friend zone” guy. He was short and trim and not at all my typical body type, but he was smart and very goofy. I like that a lot. We’d messaged a few times and one Friday when we were both online he asked what I was up to and I said I was thinking of hitting the casino or finding some karaoke. He said he was heading out to do karaoke and a quick meet-up happened. It was too loud to talk too much, but it was great karaoke and I credit him for introducing me to the place! We had fun but I think we defined “no chemistry” – which is actually okay too. I want to meet friends as well. I was more than a little bit put off by the fact that he had two very young children and had only been separated for two weeks! Yikes! Still, I heard from him again recently and we exchanged a few messages. I could see us being friends, but I don’t think either of us was particularly entranced by the other. Though I got my first “cougar” text on my drive home from meeting this guy. Most interesting story – for another blog entry!

H46 – I don’t even remember his real name. That’s horrible! I even checked my contacts. I can still see his profile on POF, but I can’t remember the name of my first coffee meet! Ugh! This one was my fault. I really led him on and I feel bad. This guy showed up for coffee and filled the doorway – he was a mountain of a man – height and weight both. While very nice and very attracted to me – as he stated quite clearly – I wasn’t very attracted and our coffee talk revealed that he was very conservative among other things that didn’t click with me. A few Obama jokes and I was just about done, but we were both talkers and our coffee wound up being almost three hours long. I take responsibility for that. I gave him the impression that it was going well when in fact, I had just given us enough time to discover what didn’t work. Also, I kept thinking that he reminded me of someone and I couldn’t put my finger on who. Finally I did. My deceased father-in-law. Ugh. No. If there was any hope of anything happening with him (which there wasn’t) that had just put the nail in the coffin. He asked me to go for a walk or to dinner to turn our meeting into a date but I declined. Later I sent him an email saying what a pleasure it was to have met him and I hoped that we could be friends, but that his resemblance to my FIL was disconcerting and I couldn’t imagine a romance resulting. I also made some rather nice statements about him reminding me that my son got his beautiful eyes from my FIL and such. I was very complimentary and nice but he was quite pissed and told me it was “my loss” and we most certainly did not become friends after that.

B36 was a big, goofy teddy bear of a guy with piercing blue eyes and a winning smile. We messaged for a few days before exchanging numbers and then texted often. He would send me messages saying “hey beautiful” and we made plans to meet for coffee or a drink after he got off from work on Memorial Day. However, as it happened, his relief at work called in and quit and he was stuck providing security at a local office complex. He had been up for a long time, had been working for 12 hours and was enjoying the holiday pay and overtime but was dismayed at not getting to see me. He kept me posted on updates from his dispatcher, but it looked like it wasn’t going to happen. He kept us both entertained by sending funny little pictures and videos of himself at work. He joked about me bringing him some coffee. One of the photos he sent clearly showed the logo of the place he was providing security for so I looked it up and went to go get him some coffee. I figure he’s security, right? I messaged him right before I got there and he was thrilled. We met in the parking lot for coffee. He was a big guy, but he wore it well by being both broad and tall. I thought he was pretty sexy and the feeling seemed mutual. Before long we were exchanging kisses. Soon, we were making out. He also loved to put his hands on my neck and shoulders – which makes me crazy. And licking. He was a licker – tonguing my neck and ear like a starving man. I could only imagine the other things that tongue could do. Man, it had been SO LONG since I had had sex and even longer since I had been that turned on! He was still working though, and still waiting to hear about someone coming to relieve him. Finally, the call came that someone would be there in about 30 minutes. We discussed whether to try to meet another time or what. I knew he was exhausted but he didn’t care – he still wanted to spend time with me. I invited him to come to my place. I was ready for some SEX! 

Eventually, he followed me back to my place. I did manage to get his full name and let my friend know that I was bringing him home before doing so – safety first! This was the first guy that I had brought home to my new place. He grew up in my neighborhood and knew it well. I was looking forward to that tongue in action but besides some making out, there wasn’t a further demonstration. He was tired and I was absolutely understanding. He wasn’t tremendously endowed either – a slight disappointment, but I was still looking forward to having it in me! Yay! We got the condom applied and lined up the shot and he was having trouble getting in. I opted for rear-entry due to our size and to get maximum use out of his finger-sized member. On the third failed attempt at entry he said “sorry” and then lay back on the bed. Ugh! Frustrating! I figured I would have to take charge of the situation…until I realized what he was apologizing for. He’d cum without ever making it inside of me. Oh MAN! Goddammit! I was so annoyed! But I managed to keep it mostly to myself while being very understanding about the fact that it had “been a long time” and that he was really tired from working so long. Okay, go to sleep and let’s try in the morning, yeah? No. Instead he talked my face off about conservative politics, his female roommate, his cat, more conservative politics, how he was a pro-Life Republican and I was an idiot. Hey bub, if you are suddenly so full of energy, how about putting that tongue to better use than talking bullshit? Jeez what a disappointment! We tried to get together again. He would text me with “hey sexy” and “hey beautiful” and we would make tentative plans that he never seemed to follow through on. He didn’t have enough money to put gas in his stupid monster truck, they cut his hours, or worst, “sounds good – I’ll let you know” followed by…nothing. Seriously. The guy’s last words to me were “okay, beautiful.” After that? I didn’t bother.

Seriously though, both B36 & N42 (whom we will talk about later,) were invited over to my place for food that I bought and cooked, football and sex. Both stood me up. What kind of man turns down food, football & sex? I tell you, it’s the kind I don’t want to mess with anymore! Buh-bye! NEXT!

 

15
Mar
13

Follow me on twitter #risquedivorcee

Risque Divorcee Image

Follow me on twitter! I have been much more active there than on the blog itself. Enjoy a “quickie” with the Risque Divorcee!

11
Mar
13

@risquedivorcee #risquedivorcee

In honor of my blog’s one-week anniversary I have made an effort to strengthen the ability to cross-post, share and find me. Therefore, I now have a Facebook fan page (with zero likes) and a Twitter feed. Find me, friend me & share me! (Sound like my dating strategy!)

https://twitter.com/RisqueDivorcee

http://www.facebook.com/therisquedivorcee

09
Mar
13

Ironic

Gee, remember when I said that I needed to call Comcast? Argh! Please enjoy the irony resulting from me starting a blog and having my Internet shut off in the same week!

Yes, I guess that this was a calculated risk that I chose to take. About 3 weeks ago I got a bill for nearly $600. Apparently they had stopped auto-deducting for no reason and I was in arrears. Well, shit! I wasn’t super excited about paying the delinquent amount all in one fell swoop. I also would rather get a Brazilian than call Comcast customer service! Ugh! I needed to cancel the cable & keep the Internet but after a week or so they cut my cable off but the web access remained. I knew I needed to attend to the issue but wondered how long I could skate by.

Well, my answer came today I’m the form of a sexy yet somewhat hostile cable subcontractor named Greg. He disturbed my afternoon blog writing with a sharp “cop knock” applied to my front storm door. No doorbell for this fella. Heck no! After giving him a good scan through the peephole and being satisfied at finding him standing in the yard rather than on the porch, I opened the door. Greg informed me in a rich, baritone voice that he was here to collect the cable box and modem and do my disconnect. Poop. Did we have an appointment?

I asked him exactly that and inquired if it was possible to return the equipment and keep the Internet hooked up. He gave me this sort of blowoff “I’m just here to do the disconnect unless you want to pay the account in full” response. I said “okay, so how much would I need to give you in order to do that?” This seemed to completely knock him for a loop. He said “well, you’ll have to contact customer service. I have to do the disconnect regardless.” Thus began a little back and forth where I pointed out that he just contradicted himself and asked whether he was doing the disconnect regardless or if he could prevent it if I paid the full balance. I should say that I was using my most polite and reasonable tone throughout the exchange.

Tough collector/disconnector guy Greg finally said “look, ma’am, I’m not here to go back and forth and negotiate with you…” I said “no, absolutely. And I’m not attempting to negotiate, I am just trying to clarify your previous statement that you don’t need to disconnect if I pay the full balance.” Defeated, he said “yeah, I’m sorry. That was inaccurate. You need to contact customer service and get re-connected. But you really should do that anyway because you should close this account. You were really paying way too much a month.”

Oh I see, now we’re pals. I went inside and disconnected the equipment. I brought it out and got a receipt and we talked a bit. Suddenly he’s Mr. Chatty and even…um…is my radar off or is he being flirty? Jesus. He’s like 25! I’m in yoga pants! But I go with it and briefly consider making one if those corny porno scenes come true. Young cable guy with hard hat & tool belt and a voice that sounds like melted chocolate? Yum. I decide to push my luck as he tells me it’s his last day working in my area. I suggest that he could just leave the Internet on and nobody would be the wiser. I tell him that I don’t need the modem because I have my own and I see it…that moment of hesitation and consideration as he paused, partway up the ladder and thought about it. Then he turned and looked down at me with a big smile and said “yeah, sorry, I have to follow the work order. Unfortunately I don’t agree with everything they do.”

Aaawww…thanks sweetie. Sorry about your not getting laid on your last day and all. 😉 No! No! I’m a slut, after all. Exchanging goods or services for sex would make me a whore. Let’s not go there just yet!

08
Mar
13

friday freak-outs, flirtations and friskiness!

I’m kind of a spaz right now. I need food. I need a drink. I need to get laid. Okay, maybe I’ll rub one out before heading out to see about all the rest. Yeah, I’d better! I’m in such a mood that I could see myself calling C43 and saying “hey, buddy – aren’t we due for our quarterly, no-strings friend fuck?” I’m feeling quite randy.

I know it’s obnoxious to say that I’m in a “dry spell” just because I haven’t had sex in nine days. I would be an asshole to say that. Particularly because I’ve gone for several months without it in the not-so-distant past. At the time of my separation I’d had sex one time in nine months. I guess there’s a use it or lose it factor in play. I’ve been using it and I miss it and I’m horny tonight. I recently parted ways permanently with my “standby guy” of the past six months (S46) after a drunk, obnoxious and rather physical scene just over a week ago. (Okay, yeah, nine days ago.) 😦

Part of the reason that I’m cranked up tonight is because I have been enjoying a little text flirtation with the stunningly sexy P29. Amongst my friends P29 is referred to as “young Brad Pitt” because he looks like he walked out of Legends of the Fall in 1994. He’s delicious and excellent in the sack – a fairly impressive trait for first-time sex with someone that young. I haven’t seen him in 2 1/2 weeks and we’ve not communicated very much since he kissed me goodbye at my door. Last week I sent a text saying “not sure if we’re still pals, but I’m hanging out at…” and he assured me that we’re still pals. Tonight I hit him up to see if he wanted to play but sadly, he’s in Vegas for the weekend. He was a little more chatty and flirty tonight than he usually is and my panties are moist as a result. Man this guy turns me on. I want to climb him. I want him to move in for six weeks so that I can ruin him for other women. Ugh. Add to that sexual tension, S32 (the guy who cancelled on me for Thursday) sent me some flirty texts tonight too. These two guys fall into the “most sexy” category of my current lineup. They are also the youngest, but I’m not sure that’s why. C43 is very sexy – he’s just not that into me and he’s a bit down on himself and life right now, so that takes away from the zing! factor.

I decided to get on POF and see what was shaking there. I don’t usually make the first move but did tonight. I recognize that I am a certain age and a certain “flavor” that not all men care for. That’s not putting myself down or being self-deprecating. That’s being a realist and being honest. I don’t want someone who is going to “settle” for me because I seem nice or they want to get laid. I want someone who freaking loves my curvy body. So generally I let the chubby chasers come to me. One of those, R41, has been messaging me pretty regularly for a little over a week. Our chats have been really casual but then he’ll throw in a comment about wondering if I’m naked or say something about my boobs probably needing to be free pretty soon. Anyway, he went dark three days ago and hasn’t been responding to my “hey, happy weekend” posts. Dammit. I’d take that 6′ 3” sporto tonight.

I had a couple of men message me that didn’t really interest me. (See? I can actually be selective – even when I’m randy as hell!) A couple that I messaged gave witty responses but demurred about meeting. No instant gratification for me – at least without batteries.

I may be extra wired tonight because of a couple of earlier freak-outs too. I may have some residual adrenaline on board. What happened? Well, I’m trying my best to make risquedivorcee.com a legitimate blog with followers, comments and regular views. I like disciplining myself to write each day and having an audience to speak to seems to help keep me engaged. So, today after my earlier post, I decided to make a Facebook site for the blog as an attempt to increase traffic. After much consideration, I opted just to use my personal gmail account as the email. I was just starting the process of signing up for a new Facebook (careful not to “find friends” using my email account, natch,) when I noticed that I already had a friend request. I found that…odd…since I hadn’t so much as put a profile pic or my website address in yet. When I clicked on the friend request, I was told that the name was being withheld until I verified my email address. I hadn’t even gotten that far. So I verified the address and checked to see who my first friend request was from. It was from my younger brother.  😦  SO! NOT! OKAY! 😦

Nooooooo! Why? Seriously? Is he following my blog? Does he know it’s me? Does he not? Is he attracted to this frisky female or is he saving up all this information so that he can go on a killing spree? Good grief! I freaked out and called my niece, Olivia* who is not his daughter but knows all about this blog. I made her go through all her email accounts to see if I had accidentally sent out some sort of announcement inviting my friends to find me on Facebook. She received nothing.  That was a relief, but why did I get a request from him and why so fast? It occurred to me that a mutual Facebook friend of ours had linked to my blog earlier this week and maybe he saw it. It’s possible that he just happened to see risquedivorcee was on Facebook so that he could “like” it at the precise moment that I was creating an account. It’s possible. Still…creepy and weird!

Finally, it occurred to me that what likely happened was that at some time he probably did some sort of “find friends” thing using his email contacts and that my gmail address was one of them. It was probably some sort of auto-generated thing that happened the moment that I created the Facebook account.Yeah, that seems much more likely than any other scenario that I could imagine.

Also, I realized a couple of hours ago that my public profile on Word Press used a link that contained my actual name. I have since changed my user ID, but if you looked at my profile during the past five days you could have seen that. Fixed now!

I am not ashamed of myself or my behavior at all. I am just not ready to be “outed” yet. This blog isn’t exactly private – I am sharing it with strangers after all – but it’s intended for a select audience of supportive, interested and like-minded people. It is not intended for my brother. (Dude, if you recognize yourself in this post I think you’d better call me, okay?)

Meanwhile, I’m hungry in more ways than one and I think I’m going to get a little tarted up and see what kind of trouble I can find this evening. What are you guys up to?

*not her real name.




Categories

Quickies with the Risqué Divorcée!

  • Facebook "It looks like you're at Burger King. Check in to share with your friends." Me: shut the fuck up, Facebook! 2 years ago
  • RT @amyisprettycool: Ok, who wrote the Melissa McCarthy as Sean Spicer #SNL sketch because they just made America great again 2 years ago
  • RT @LuvPug: My husband thinks it's so cute when I speak to him with terms of endearment like 'honey' or 'cockblocker' 2 years ago
  • RT @SondraDeeMe: I've always had a soft spot in my heart for female T-Rex because the tampon insertion must've been really difficult. 2 years ago
  • RT @joss: To everyone who keeps saying "Go back to making jokes/films/etc", WHAT DO YOU THINK WE WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING 2 years ago